Life of the Party
We were warned prior to having kids that most of our friends just wouldn't understand.
The lifestyle change was pretty drastic for us. Prior to getting pregnant, we were oblivious to what life with a baby is like. We were the people you parents know you have in your life... the ones that don't get it or even try to relate. We never asked the questions to new parents, what is it like? To us, the idea was so far away, even if that far away was only a few years at the time. We lived in the moment. Life was all about us, what party we were going to that night, the next place we were jet-setting to, or what time we were going to meet up with everyone for brunch or happy hour. Ignorance is bliss, yeah? It was!
To be fair to myself, we surrounded ourselves with others that were similar in lifestyle to us at the time so I didn't have a real opportunity to indulge in the baby game. None of my girlfriends were pregnant or had just had a baby. We became the first. So now we are finding ourselves with a plus one among our "single" friends, as I like to now call the child-less couples we know. And I am sitting here contemplating how lucky we have it, having great friends that have extended support to us even though they don't relate to this phase just yet. Do they understand? Not completely. And they shouldn't... or can't... until it's their own time. But they still try and the stay involved... that's what counts.
To my friends:
Although I appreciate the invites to meet up for girls night, late night happy hours, the last minute birthday parties, Vegas trips and everything else we used to participate in, pre-baby, the fact is it's just not possible anymore. At least not in the quantity and ease that it used to be. But the fact that you haven't counted us out despite our rigid schedules and the fact that we can't just drop the kid off at Grandma's for the evening on last minute notice is the reason we're still friends! That you have adopted him into our group just like he had been there all along seriously just makes me melt. You treat him like he's the life of the party, which he usually is! I feel like he is the social butterfly that he has become because of the attention you give him and involvement you've had in his life. I've stayed sane as a first time, stay-at-home mom because I have our time together to look forward to. Sure, our participation in social events is not at the frequency it once was, but that's ok. Because I love being a mom and staying home with him, so missing out really isn't missing out. This is now my life that I have chosen for myself and my family and we are finding that middle ground that is good for us. I'm babbling now but one more time, Thank You for being there and for being so understanding. Now start having babies so we can have play-dates.